'As the IPO gets closer I don't want senior management to experience eye-off-the- ball syndrome', Ed writes in his diary, 'so I've decided that we need someone who can keep operations on an even keel while I, and some of the top management. look at what we need to do tart things up for the public offering.'
'I've got my friend Murray, who was COO at my last company, to come in and keep things ticking over', reads a diary entry a few days later, 'in fact I want him to do more than that.
A few days later, the diary reads: '
'Board meeting today', a later entry reads, 'I talk about the need to keep everything running smoothly in the run up to the public offer, then mention I'm bringing someone in. I tell them a bit about
'Eventually', writes Ed, 'our vp in charge of manufacturing operations asks: "So what will
'I reply: "He'll be my deputy, and will report direct to me, but he won't have specific operational responsibilities except for a wide-ranging brief to look at all areas of the company's activities."
'"So he's what you might call vice president for kicking ass', said the manufacturing guy.
'There's a nasty laugh from the operational directors. The others say nothing. My popularity has no sunk to somewhere South of Radovan Karadzic's.'
'Still, there's only 221 days to go to the IPO and I'm away from this rat-hole with big, beautiful, bundles of bunce.'
Mein Gott, David! How *do* you dream-up these outrageously fanciful storylines? Have you been buzzing gas or eating cheese before bed?
I mean, really: the thought of the woefully inept somehow reaching the pinnacles of business and then shipping in their cronies into (shareholder-bankrolled...) senior positions of questionable value or necessity and pissing-off exisiting staff!? Ha! Oh my giddy aunt! The very thought...
I know, I know, The Baron, I just can't imagine where these ideas come from