The world’s largest collection of binary jokes. Are there only two of them? If you include a ternary joke, there may be three (‘The Top 11 Binary Jokes’?)…

**#1 – There are only 10 types of people (part I) **

Following the **Impossible Objects – The Simplified Calculator** post, a recent commenter on *Made By Monkeys* cracked the classic:

*There are only 10 types of people in the world. Those that understand binary and those that don’t.*

**#2 – “…0110010011100…”**

*Looking on the Internet for a witty riposte, for the above comment – (How did Oscar W. manage before Google?) – I came across this classic “binary joke”:*

*00110110101110011010001010010101
10011010101010010111100110101100
10100101011010010111100110100101*

But hold your sides, there’s more…

**#3 – There are only 10 types of people (part II) **

*Google also provided this variant on a theme, which I didn’t hesitate to reuse:There are only 10 types of people in the world – those who understand ternary, those who don’t, and those who mistake it for binary*

So far the total, stood at three. And trust me I searched the whole Internet. All of it, via Google. For at least fifteen minutes. And then the irreplaceable Wikipedia – courtesy of its **Mathematical joke** article – added some more, by cunningly reaching into the world of hexadecimal…

**#4 – Some pictures are worth more that a thousand words**

*Our own Alice Caroll was challenged to invent a fourth binary joke, and this picture is what Alice came up with, which has been languishing over on Engineer in Wonderland since January 2011.*

**#5 – DEAD people and hexadecimal**

*If only DEAD people understand hexadecimal, how many people understand hexadecimal?
57,005.*

And wait, there’s still more. There’s octal…

**#6 – Mathematicians confusing Halloween and Christmas**

*Why do mathematicians always confuse Halloween and Christmas?
Because 31 Oct = 25 Dec.*

**#7 – There are only 11 types of people (part III)**

*And then a commenter provided this new variant on the theme, involving… Roman Numerals: *

*There are only eleven types of people. Those who understand Roman Numerals and those who don’t. *

And, err, that’s it. Yes, that’s really it. This is the world’s largest collection of “binary jokes” (with added ternary, octal and hexadecimal goodness). There aren’t any more…

If you know different, of course, do let me know, and I’ll add them! But don’t get me on the subject of Pi jokes that’s a whole other blog post…

**PS.** Check out this *Made By Monkeys* post for an example of *visual* Logic Gate humour (!): **Will the Real NAND Gates Please Stand Up?**

**PPS.** Another binary joke via the *Made By Monkeys* blog – **I can’t believe someone makes… Numerist clocks**. It’s binary, but not base 2. It’s a joke, but it’s not funny:

“An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar. The first one orders a beer. The second orders half a beer. The third, a quarter of a beer. The bartender says, ‘You’re all idiots’, and pours two beers.”

**PPPS.** Do check out the Comments section below or you will miss such gems as:

**What is FACE value in decimal? 64206****Says the 0 to the 1: why the long face?****I turned on the radio this morning, i think it’s broken, all i heard was “FFFFFF” it turns out it was White Noise!****11 cheers for binary!**

There are 10 people in this world: those who understand hexadecimal and f the rest…

Like it, Aubrey. A slightly rude binary joke!

Just thought of this one while reading the one about programming :

A java byte and a C# byte walk into a bar. The C# byte says “Why are you so negative?” the Java byte replies “Cause I’m signed”.

Thanks Brian. You’ve opened up a new front with Roman Numerals!

Would any passing Latin Scholars (well known for their humour, of course) like to share some ancient levity? A funny thing happened (counting) on the way to the Forum…

There are only eleven types of people. Those who understand Roman Numerals and those who don’t.

Just heard this one:

How easy is it to count in binary?

It’s as easy as 1, 10, 11.

1 + 1 = 10

but only in a binary world

🙂

Like it, Dubularity. Maybe we could say the jokes are Funny NAND Original. Logic Gate humour could be a whole new unexplored world of comedy! Check out this Made By Monkeys post for an example of visual Logic Gate humour: Will the Real NAND Gates Please Stand Up?

Dublarity:

Top 101 jokes?

NOT Funny

alan tin-win:

you’re either on the bus or off the bus …….

GraemeQ:

2 vaguelly amusing jokes, mainly programming based but thats all binary 🙂 Why do Java developers wear glasses? Because they don’t C# How longs a piece of string? string.length

Chris Allen

Getting away from things a bit, but there was an Irish DJ (really was Irish – not being funny there) who played a song for a lady who “…is 111 today. 111 ladies and gentlemen, imagine that…eh,,, sorry, who is ill today…”

Thanks. It could be a whole new world… of colour code humour!

Jokey:

I turned on the radio this morning, i think it’s broken, all i heard was “FFFFFF” it turns out it was White Noise! lol

Steve:

No one seems to have contributed “11 cheers for binary!”

Tim:

‘sup geeks? I thought of a binary joke this afternoon: “says the 0 to the 1: why the long face?” I know it’s so lame that you want to scratch your eyes out, but whatevs. Thought I’d share it anyway 🙂 Stay awesome!

nformejohn:

Saw it and thought it was funny. 1010011010 Binary number of the beast

Praneeth:

What is FACE value in decimal? 64206 (Inspired by the DEAD men joke)

It’s not a great one Phoenix, but rather than the 1s and 0s actually meaning anything (i.e. a real _binary_ joke), it is meant to represent a standard joke just transcribed in binary form(!!!!) No, I didn’t say it was funny, but it is a “binary joke”… Which joke was it? I’ll say it was “Two goldfish in a tank…” 😉

A reader [Pheonix] replied: I didn’t get the 00110110101110011010001010010101 10011010101010010111100110101100 10100101011010010111100110100101 joke.. any1 care to shed some light on it?

Thanks to Sue P. for this one – a sine wave joke (!). She writes: You’ve probably heard this before but it’s new to me and going round the universities at the moment: Sine wave walks into a bar. Barman says: “Why the long phaze?”

A reader [anon] replied: what do you call two canaries? a Binary!!!