Am I Thick?

Sometimes I wonder if I’m a bit thick. What are the ‘new technologies of awareness’?

I want to know because it is these ‘new technologies of awareness’ which will see  Europe increase its tech spending by more than any other region in 2010.

US market researchers, Forrester of Cambridge, Massachusetts, say European tech purchases will rise 11.2% this year whereas US tech spending will only go up 6.6%.

 

Excellent.

 

It’s nice, though unusual, to see Europeans being more positive than the Yanks.

 

A Forrester vp called Andrew Bartels says there will be six to seven years of innovation and growth in tech based on ‘smart computing’.

 

Excellent.

 

Then Bartels says: “New technologies of awareness married to advanced business intelligence analytics make computing smart.”

 

Now I’m lost.

 

“Smart computing”, adds Bartels, “rests on new foundation technologies such as service-oriented architecture, server and storage virtualisation, cloud computing, and unified communications.”

 

Am I thick? Or is this bollox?


Comments

15 comments

  1. Thanks, James S

  2. No.
    Total bollox.

  3. Not a chance, AndyRem, the software developers are all gamers who think that what users want is a mind-bending, thought-twisting, grief-stricken experience which they have to fight their way through if they want to win the great prize of being able to use a product feature.

  4. I don’t suppose that these ‘new technologies of awareness’ refer to the software providers becoming aware of what technologies the user actually wants? Nooo – that would be expecting far too much!
    “Smart computing”, adds AndyRem, “rests on new foundation technologies such as service…”
    If only :-(

  5. I had a Palm Pilot application called buzzword generator.
    Unfortunately, it only generated two or three-word phrases.
    I can see an opening for an iPhone application here.
    Presumably my poor old Palm was processor limited, so an iPhone (or Android fro those communists amongst us)could be an ideal platform for this sort of important business tool.

  6. Mike, you managed to uses sesquipedalian grandiloquence before I managed to. I think I’m going to use this phrase quite a bit. Yes, I’m sure you’re right about our big purchasers of tech stuff, I bet they’re pussy-cats compared to US purchasers.

  7. Well, Steve, I must say I don’t usually see Forrester stuff and I liked this report because it was so unusual to see Europe out-spending the US in tech. I agree all forward-looking reports have to be treated sceptically, but that doesn’t mean they should be ignored. As to Ellison/Cloud type computing I think it’s a long way off still because of the shitty state of the wireless networks.

  8. “say European tech purchases will rise 11.2% this year whereas US tech spending will only go up 6.6%.”
    In fact we probably buy the same gizmos as the US and the difference is all down to companies looking to restore the margins they overcharged Europeans by (due to our ‘fragmented markets’) which were lost in the downturn. They are just hoping this ‘sesquipedalian grandiloquence’ (aka as marketing speak :-), will hide our awareness of the actual reason.

  9. “It’s the Larry Ellison Internet PC all over again.”
    Except that this time, it might come to pass. Maturing back-end technologies (SOA, virtualization – and now its reverse – physicalization) meet smaller, higher-powered clients (netbooks, smart phones), meet more pervasive network connectivity (3G, 4G, whatever).
    It’s true: we’ve heard this story before, but for some reason I think these serial failures (like Forrester) might have gotten it right(ish) this time merely by repeating it for long enough. Maybe I’m the thick one here…
    Perhaps off-topic, but can you explain why anyone listens to Forrester, ever? Or do they?

  10. Yes, David M, I think ‘kinda somesuch’ sort of sums it up

  11. Zilch, Robert.

  12. Wow, The Baron, ‘sesquipedalian grandiloquence’ indeed. What a splendid phrase. I can’t wait to use it myself. As to the explanation of all that sesquipedalianism, I’m sure you’re absolutely right. It’s the Larry Ellison Internet PC all over again.

  13. It’s maybe not completely meaningless, but I think he’s trying to make it sound much more cryptic via sesquipedalian grandiloquence. The music hall presenters of yore would be proud.
    I think – and I may be wrong owing to the strong encryption I had to break through to get there – he’s essentially trying to say “We’ll return to the central mainframe and terminals model (that everyone was so keen to pooh-pooh over the last two decades)”. However, you don’t get to demand big pay and industry hacks chasing you for your essential pearls of wisdom if you let the cat out the bag through speaking plainly that you have little of groundbreaking importance to say.
    That’s what my spider senses are saying anyway…

  14. I’d assume he means context awareness or location awareness or somesuch, which is kinda valid and kinda marketing bollocks, depending on the quality of the coffee you’ve drunk beforehand.

  15. Reports a load of bollox, if you ask me, but to get back to your first question, the answer to “Am I thick” depends on how much you paid for the report :-)

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