When you get the Prime Minister rhapsodising about the Internet of Things you know that the imprimatur of flakiness has been bestowed on IoT.
Like Y2K when Tony Blair was paraded to spout fashionable nonsense to back up the doom-sayers’ predictions of disaster.
At the CeBit trade fair in Hanover our PM shamefully spouted IoT waffle before announcing that the government would contribute £45 million to advance the technology.
“I see the Internet of Things as a huge transformative development – a way of boosting productivity, of keeping us healthier, making transport more efficient, reducing energy needs, tackling climate change,” rambled our delusional PM, “these are developments that could allow literally billions of everyday objects to talk to each other over the Internet – using low-cost, low-power chips. And this has enormous potential to change our lives, electricity meters that talk to the grid to get you the best deals, health monitors that keep an eye on your heart rate, water pipes that warn of a fall in pressure.”
“This is a world on fast forward,” gushed David Cameron, “a world of permanent technological revolution. And in this world, countries like the UK and Germany will only succeed if we have a relentless drive for new ideas and innovations.”
Backed, of course, by a relentless tide of government investment to the princely tune of £45 million.
Cameron has, to date, shown zero understanding of high-tech and we all rather suspect he neither knows nor cares about IoT but has got some idiot PR to concoct this rubbish to show he’s on-message with other delusional techie fashionistas.
Ever since the transistor was invented it has been used to automate functions and it is still being used to automate functions.
We really don’t need a nouveau-tech bollox-phrase to describe a process that has been going on for over 60 years.
The intriguing question is who gets the £45 million?
It’s a piss in the sea compared to the funding needed to create a new generation of sensors, or to advance sensor manufacturing processes, to develop new energy harvesting devices, or to improve low-power radio technologies.
It will probably be spent on projects like ‘IoT Awareness’ or stigmatising ‘IoT-Deniers’.
And so we sink below the murky tide of bollox.