It doesn’t take an engineering degree to figure out why a USB key needs a slim profile. To wit, everything from PEZ dispensers to Swiss Army Knives have been employed as casings for the portable memory devices. That’s why this new USB memory key/pendant due out from Active Crystals in August simply screams impracticality. Encrusted with Swarovski crystals, it’s an eye-catching little thing. Just like a magpie, I’m attracted to pretty, glittery objects. And it has an ample 1GB of memory. But it’s fat. And when you need to plug in your keyboard, mouse, Skype phone, camera, iPod and all the other gizmos, the thought of using what amounts to a double-wide device just seems profligate. Give me function over form any day.