Ed Draws Up The Black List

‘Alleluia. Result,’ writes Ed in his diary, ‘I don’t know how she’s done it, but Horrible Harriet has persuaded The Brats to appoint my mate Bob Tyrell to be her replacement as COO.’

Harriet was the COO imposed on Ed by his company’s private equity owners who were forced out by Ed’s dirty tricks, and The Brats are the 20-something-year-old super-sharpies employed by the owners to monitor Ed’s company.


‘Now we’re going to have some fun,’ adds Ed, ‘Bob’s a hard bastard. Job 1 is to get rid of all those placemen put in by Harriet and The Brats to spy for the PE bastards (I mean our sponsors).’


‘Job 2 is to use Ed’s extensive contacts in the industry to do some mischief to our competition.’


A month later the diary entry reads.


‘Called the top managers to a meeting to introduce Bob. I spelt it out to the Harriet-cronies. “Some of you, I know, were close to Harriet Huntsman and her ways of doing things. Those ways will now change, so some of you, and I know who you are,  may want to review your future with this company.”


‘You could have heard a pin drop.’


‘Later in my office with Bob I hand him a list of all the marked men together with files on each one – some of them company files, some from the private dick I employed to get Harriet.’


‘”First of all we’ll do some pruning of the rose bush,” I said to Bob, “then we’ll dig in some dung and get the bugger to grow”.’


‘Bob grinned. He’s a man after my own heart,’ writes Ed, ‘roll on my $25 mill.’

Tags: bastards

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  1. Anonymous
    March 09, 2012 09:55

    I do so hope that’s not the Tyrell of Tyrell Corp.
    If so, he’s busy designing the Nexus 6 replicants.
    The one to watch out for is Roy Batty.

  2. David Manners
    March 05, 2012 17:39

    Sounds very prescient, Lefty, after all, on the principle that birds of a feather flock together, any friend of Ed’s is bound to be a first-class shit.

  3. Lefty Goldblatt
    March 05, 2012 16:33

    Bob will turn on Ed someday… mark my words.

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