Eds Sets Out To Cut A Dash

The Frogs have got this graft gig sorted, Ed confides to his diary, I’m an amateur in comparison. Look at this Fillon guy who gets his suits paid for by an industrialist and still gets 20% of the Presidential vote. With Savile Row suits costing £5K these days, that’s worth compromising one’s purity for.

We’re a bit goody-goody – the Frogs seem to expect their pols to be on the take – here it’s career-limiting – look at Neil Hamilton and Al Fayed.

These top industrial types, or rather their aides, make a point of asking about one’s taste in expensive fol-de-rols and it hadn’t occurred to me that gent’s natty suiting might be on the menu.

I need a dark blue pin-stripe and a charcoal grey pin-stripe for social occasions and for impressing foreigners when abroad. For the Commons, it’s M&S off the shelf so I don’t stand out from the other scruffy oiks.

I think Anderson & Sheppard is the place to go. I’ll make some enquiries with them about a suit so they’ll know who I am when my benefactor funds my account. Next time I’m approached a by business type looking for a favour or two I’ll murmur their name.

“Why,” I ask my Permanent Secretary, “do you top Whitehall chaps look so damn smart when we politicians tend to look a bit shabby?”

“It’s appropriate for those running the country to look well-dressed, Secretary of State,” he replies, “but a politician must look like a man of the people.”

Quite so.

But if I’m back in civvy street after the election,  I’ll be able to cut a bit of a dash.

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